Stepdad refuses to pay for 16-year-old stepdaughter's phone after she mocked his 13-year-old son

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Apr 2, 2026 8:00 PM EDT

His son barely speaks at the dinner table anymore because of this incident.

Should parents be required to pay for their misbehaving kids' smartphones? If you asked that question 15 years ago, the majority of people would think it's asinine for a teenager to require the most advanced cell phone technology, especially after they've proven they can't use it responsibly. I got a Nokia when I was 10 so that I could communicate with my parents in case of an emergency, text my friends within the limited number of texts per month, and play Tetris. I would definitely have had my phone taken away if I had gone over the allotted texts per month, let alone send cruel messages to my sibling. These days, kids will become social pariahs in middle school if they don't keep up with the latest social media trend, and that's because their parents are as addicted to their phones as their kids, and don't see anything wrong with their little angels having 14 hours of screentime. There's nothing worse than permissive parenting in an era where unfettered access to Instagram and TikTok at age 10 is the norm. 

The dad in this story saw firsthand how social media can hurt his kid, even within his own home. His stepdaughter posted a video to her private story that wasn't meant to be seen by any family members. Her stepbrother saw it, and it hurt him deeply. Now, her stepdad has to decide if he's going to punish her by refusing to pay for her phone.

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  • Woman in black and white spaghetti strap top
    via AnimGraph Lab

    A teenage girl who doesn't feel particularly ashamed about making fun of her stepbrother. 

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Am I the bad guy for refusing to pay for my stepdaughter's phone after she made fun of my son?

    I amvery emotional rn so I am sorry for my mistakes.l married my wife two years ago.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • she has a 16 year old daughter, i have a 13 year old son. blending everything has been very messy but mostly manageable.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • Mainly trying not to step on each other too much. The issue started because my son has a stutter.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • it gets worse when he is stressed. he is a sweet kid but school has been rough on him and he already gets in his own head about it.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • We have all talked about being careful with that. Last week he came home weirdly quiet and said he didnt want to go to school the next day.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • after a while he showed me a post my stepdaughter made on a private story. somebody screen recorded it and sent it around.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • it was her imitating his stutter while her friend laughed in the background. she also put text over it saying buffering.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • I was p ed. my wife was too, at first. my stepdaughter cried and said it was a joke and she didnt think anyone would send it to him.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • which to me is just another way of saying she knew it was nasty, she just didnt expect consequences.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • I know that teens are discovering this world and sometimes do not see any red lines, but I feel she is a bit old for that now.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • Here is where the fight really started. her phone screen had been cracked for a while, and i had agreed to cover half the replacement this month because money is tight on my wife's side right now.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • A broken cell phone sitting on top of a table
    via Eduardo Ramos (Unsplash+)

    A cracked iPhone, which takes a pretty penny to replace the screen.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • after seeing that video, i said i wasnt paying a cent. i told my wife i am not rewarding that kind of behavior toward my son.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • punishment should actually feel like punishment. my wife said those things are separate and i was acting out of anger.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • she grounded her daughter and made her apologize, but still thinks i should stick to what i promised.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • my stepdaughter did say sorry, but it felt forced and my son just nodded and went to his room.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • he barely talks at dinner now. my wife says i am making it harder for them to trust me and that backing out now proves i will always choose my son over her daughter.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • Portrait of a sad teenage boy looking thoughtful about troubles
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    A sad boy after being mocked by his stepsister.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • i mean... yeah, in something like this, i probably will. but i also know i made a promise before all this happened.
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • Mermaidtoo NTA This incident and its repercussions haven't ended. Your son is affected. He isn't communicating and he may be dealing with bu ying by others at his school. This kind of attack can have very longterm consequences. Your stepdaughter has failed to show true remorse for bu ying your son. Your home should be a safe space for your son. It isn't. The fact that your wife is pushing you to still fix the phone shows she isn't taking this seriously enough. Please focus on your son and his ne
    via u/Mermaidtoo
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply yeah that's where my head is at rn, everyone's stuck on the phone and i'm looking at the fact my son doesn't even feel safe in his own house, therapy is probably the move but it costs so much...
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • Wild-Painting9353 Cyberbullying is a crime. So there's that. It's mean enough she made fun of him to begin with, but doing so in a way that allowed and encouraged it to spread throughout the school and online? I would not only NOT be paying for her phone, she would not have a phone for a couple of months, at least. That is so cruel.
    via u/Wild-Painting9353
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply for me it is that she understood that doing this is not ok, thats why she was hiding it
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • Outside_Flamingo_367 The alternative is your son not having anyone in his corner and the cost of that will be a lifelong impact on his wellbeing and likely your relationship with him.
    via u/Outside_Flamingo_367
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply I am so anxious about it, but I am so scared that I will ruin everything
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • Subliminal-sandwich NTA. She's 16, she knows exactly what she's doing. Bu ying her 13 year old step brother on social media is nasty work. Stepdaughter can pay to replace her own phone screen. The real problem here is your wife insisting that you still replace the phone screen after what her daughter did.
    via u/Subliminal-sandwich
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply the screen is whatever, the weirder part is acting like she should get rescued after pulling that kinda stunt, that's the part that had me tilted ngl
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • pandora5bc NTA she doesn't get to bu y your son and still get her phone. Find something she can do to make things right with your son and if she does it for 2 months consider paying. Your wife is an a hle!
    via u/pandora5bc
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply My wife thinks that if stepdaughter is grounded, then I should not have any problems with her, but I struggle with how to put my perspective into words for her
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • No_While9064 Does your wife realize kids K!LL themselves over nasty behavior like this???? Strong NTA, wife and step are though. I wouldn't pay for a thing.
    via u/No_While9064
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply that's what makes her acting casual about it so insane, how can I show the scale of what she is doing to her?
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • trustbrown Has your wife actually had a conversation with your son to understand the impact to him? Has she earned that level of trust with him yet? Maybe that's a starting point in the conversation as you are clearly seeing a larger impact than she is.
    via u/trustbrown
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply Huh, no. I never thought of it. I will try to arrange a meeting between him and her. Or should I involve a psychologist?
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • -QueefLatina- My heart just breaks for your son. My 12 year old daughter also has a stutter and no offense OP, but if this happened to her, the last thing I would be worried about is step- daughter's phone. Especially with the way your wife wants to just sweep this under the rug. (grounding? Really?) I would be packing my bags. Your son deserves a safe home where he feels comfortable to be himself. He has a hard enough time at school and now you've essentially allowed one of his bu es into your
    via u/-QueefLatina-
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply I think about taking him for a small trip on the weekend to make him "breathe" a bit, but I am growing a lot of resentment for my sd and I do not know how to act and to be not toxic
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon
  • Puzzled-Award-2236 Just for a moment, imagine these kids belong to both of you and are actually brother and sister. Now how's it look? 16 is way too old to get away with this kind of cruelty. she didnt think anyone would send it to him Even if he never saw it, I would be grounding her even if she were only 10 years old. Things like this teach values. or lack of values. Stand your ground. It's a marriage, you're a family now and this 'your kid/my kid' thing is the beginning of the end. Keep this
    via u/Puzzled-Award-2236
  • Hirragi_Jeslon Original Poster's Reply God, I wish my wife would see your words. Do you think I need to show the post to her?
    via u/Hirragi_Jeslon

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dinner table mocking teenagers blended family stutter stepdaughter dad stepdad mom son
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